You’ve noticed a shift lately. Your thoughts about yourself are changing. Perhaps you grew up a certain way, with particular likes and dislikes. Were they ever really your own, though? Or were they adopted by way of your family or friends? 

Being a people pleaser was easier than doing what you wanted to do because it didn’t really require a ton of thought. Or maybe your role growing up was supporting someone else in the house. You’ve always received the message that you are worthy because of what you do, not because of who you are. So now, as an adult, you’ve found it challenging to identify your own beliefs and sources of happiness.

Further, you make a lot of comparisons. You scroll Instagram, then TikTok, then Twitter. Watching. Reading. Listening but not really taking in. The mental comparisons between you and the influencer or friend you’re watching have taken over your brain space. Jealousy creeps in - they have the life you thought you’d have by now. The partner, the aesthetically cute apartment or house, the family, the closet. When will it be your turn?

Nowadays, you can see there’s something more there. You may be getting some signs that you’re on the right path - angel numbers, “coincidences”, symbols, dreams. In asking yourself “who am I?” the answer isn’t always clear. That’s troubling and you’re worried about what it means to go down a path of self discovery. On the other hand, you may like that you’re being pushed to learn more about yourself. And perhaps are looking for an unbiased thought partner to help you dig deeper.

What you feel while contemplating your identity 💔: insecure, confused, curious, conflicted, drained

What you think when you struggle with your self-esteem 💭: “I’m not good enough.” “I am unworthy.” “People only like me for what I have to offer them.” “I have no idea who I am anymore.”

What you do when you question your confidence ✔: people please, avoid your own feelings, have difficulty seeing your own goodness, judge and criticize yourself and others

Gentle self-compassion is key on this path. With gentleness and forgiveness, let’s work together to identify your strengths and develop a plan for you to build up your confidence. You are worthy of being seen and affirmed. I believe in you.

Yes, vulnerability is scary. But we can do it together.

Therapy can help strengthen and improve your sense of self and rewrite your story.

If you live in Virginia, Maryland, or Washington, D.C., I can help.

Let’s work together.